What is driving your partner to cheat?

Is there anything more heartbreaking than discovering your partner is cheating? It’s a gut-wrenching feeling that often provides you with more questions than answers. “Why?” is the biggest of those questions, and it can often be much more complicated than your partner simply being a bit of a [Insert word here].

There are many reasons that can lead a partner to cheating, some of which you may feel they need support rather than simply breaking off the relationship. And while it’s never acceptable, it could be all manner of all reasons as to why it’s happening.

So, what are the main reasons why a partner may be drawn to cheating?

Intimacy issues at home

One of the main reasons is that a partner may miss the intimacy that they once felt with you. It’s quite natural as time goes on that intimacy may start to wane as couples have other things to think about, whether that be children, chores or careers. However, attention should be paid to that intimacy as it can often lead to partners looking elsewhere to find it.

However, this can be tackled before it gets to the cheating stage, with honest conversation and a concerted effort to find that passion in the bedroom once again.

Problems with addiction

It’s often we hear the excuse “I had too much to drink” or “I was high on drugs”, and while that’s not an acceptable one, it could highlight a bigger problem with addiction. Addiction can be incredibly hurtful to a relationship and as chemicals play around with the brain can not only lead to cheating, but domestic violence and a real breakdown in relationships.

That’s why it’s so important to try and identify a partner’s addiction and get them checked in to rehabilitation for drugs or alcohol to tackle it and try and get their life and your relationship back on track.

Your partner was forced?

It isn’t always as cut and dry as you may think. People can be coerced into sex and don’t often want to admit that is the reason why they cheated. It may be wise not to jump to conclusions if you find out your partner has cheated and it may initially start with compassion if you think they may have been forced into it, as well as seeking help from doctors and the police.

Your relationship is damaged

Of course, the main reason why many people turn to cheating is if the relationship is damaged or has broken down significantly. In which case, it could well signal the end and be beyond repair if they’re looking elsewhere for love, support and all the things you used to offer them and they would offer you.


An honest conversation is needed in which case to determine whether your relationship will ever work again.